I had dinner tonight with a fellow Dragon girl at Quince. I met her at my last job when we were in the same group but we never worked together so we didn't often interact. But the few times we did, we would have these long conversations about I don't even remember what. We just seemed to have a similar take on life and got along very easily.
Our friendship is simple in that we can not see each other for a year and get together and have the conversation be easy and confident. That's how it felt today. We exchanged updates on our work situations and commiserated with each other and then got to talking about relationships. Stereotypical, yes, but when two girlfriends get together to catch up, you know that relationships will figure onto the agenda.
So I asked for the latest on her and the boyfriend. They've been together for what must be at least a decade since they've known each other since school, and when we met last year, she had said that she's content to just continue as is, that she had no interest in getting married. It seems the situation hasn't changed much. She's still quite happy to carry on as they have, and he seems to agree that things are fine as is.
She maintains that she's never been the kind of girl who needs constant companionship - they will go 4 or 5 days without seeing each other but they still communicate all the time. She knows that he fully understands her and gives her the space when she needs it and supports her when she needs him close...while this sounds like what I want, I couldn't help but feel like she was rather dispassionate and rational about her relationship.
Is it foolishly romantic of me to think that if I was in a relationship, I would want to have my man close? I wouldn't expect us to spend every free moment together - I do need alone-time to re-charge - but I would miss him if I didn't see him knowing that I could, i.e. we lived in the same city and getting together didn't require hopping on a plane and travelling across the country to see each other like my last relationship.
We somehow got onto the topic of babies...I want one...a girl....eventually....I think. And if that's the case, I'd like to have this baby say by the age of 36 - which leaves me 5 years. If I work backwards, that means I've got about 2 years to find Mr. Right and get married since I'd like us to have at least a year of living together as a couple without baby. Stuff like this I obviously can't plan for...so I'll just have to see how the future unfolds...
It was really nice to have a different perspective on things tonight. I feel like I've been so pre-occupied with trying to figure out my next career move that I just haven't been seeing things clearly...and talking about it with friends who are a little more removed from the situation has helped me step back a bit to look at the big picture.
We parted with the promise that we'd try not to let another year go by before we got together again, so our goal is to meet and catch up once a quarter.
As to the food...thankfully there were 5 options to choose from in each of the first 2 courses so I went with the lighter fare: Grilled calamari, chickpea & grilled chorizo salad, chimichurri to start, followed by Grilled steak salad, watercress, spinach, green beans, roasted potatoes, balsamic roasted shallots and topped off with Frozen lemon mousse, blue berry compote.
4 down...2 more to go...