Soft Skills 101

I had a meeting this morning with my SVP that I was worried about because while I'm pretty good at the technical stuff, I'm fairly weak at packaging it up for consumption. But thanks to the coaching from J, the VP I've been working with on my current project, it went really well and I wanted to blog about it so as not to forget the lessons learned:

1. Pre-meeting, set the expectations: Send ahead an agenda via email outlining why you want to meet and what you want to cover in the meeting, along with any pre-read materials.

2. In the meeting, set the scene: Re-cap why you're meeting, what you'd like to cover and how you'd like to do it - I typically dive right into the subject at hand without setting up the context, mistakenly assuming that everyone else is on the same page as me. The truth though, is that everyone else has at least a dozen other things on the go, senior executives even moreso, so it's really important to make sure the people present all understand the purpose of the meeting and what you want to accomplish. If possible, bring along a summary to guide the discussion - this could be the pre-read material, but not necessarily.

3. Ask for clarification: If you don't understand something, don't be afraid to put your hand up and say so.

4. You don't have to have all the answers: If something comes up that you don't have an answer to, it's OK to say, "Let me look into that and get back to you."

5. Review the next steps: At the end of the meeting, play-back the next steps and the decisions made to make sure everyone's in agreement as to what's been decided and what's left to-do.

Lesson to Learn

I'm a sucker for all the pre-Oscar stuff because I like to see all the pretty dresses so I've been parked off and on for the last few hours flipping through all the pre-Oscar coverage and happened upon the segment on Barbara Walters' annual special and her interview with Anne Hathaway.

When asked to describe the last year, Hathaway said she learned that vulnerability is not the same as weakness. Vulnerability is not the same as weakness. This is something I definitely need to learn.

Go Free Rice

You have time to kill? Well go and play Free Rice - for each word you get right, they donate 20 grains of rice to the UN World Food Program. Thanks to the competitive element - my best vocab level so far is 43 - it's better than any Word-of-the-Day and you actually learn something while killing time and doing good. For example - did you know that tatterdemalion is another word for ragamuffin because I didn't even know it was a word! How's that for value-add?

Two things

Two things - the first just irks me and the second is sort of random or maybe not:

I skipped my running clinic tonight since I got home late from work and it was raining to boot, so instead, I went to the gym and ran on the treadmill (almost 5.5K tonight!) On my way there, I noticed something that bugged me. What's that? Well, the sprinklers. The sprinklers and the rain.

My usual gym is located in an office building that's surrounded by green lawns. Building management has these signs right by the door announcing how they conserve energy by dimming the lights so as not to stress the power grid, yet they continue to program the sprinklers to water the lawns like clockwork when it's been a dry summer and some areas have been calling for restriction on lawn watering. If they went to the trouble of putting in a sprinkler system, shouldn't they have considered putting in some kind of smart sensor that detects whether there's been rainfall so the system knows not to come online? We have an automatic sprinkler system at home and it's smart enough to do that. Inconsistencies like this bug me.

And the other thing is that I've noticed for a while now that say, 85% of the spam I get in my gmail account is Chinese spam, which isn't at all the case for the spam I get in my Yahoo account. Why do you suppose that is? I usually delete all spam without looking at it, but out of curiosity today, I opened one of the messages and my guess is that it's from Hong Kong or Taiwan because they've used Traditional Chinese characters as opposed to Simplified, which would signify a message probably from China.

And speaking of Chinese, my final is this Saturday and I haven't opened my textbook nor listened to my CDs in a couple weeks. I'm pretty much resigned to losing my 4.0 average since my teacher this term has had unrealistic expectations from the start for her mainly Canadian-born students and despite us speaking to her about these unrealistic expectations, she's carried on instructing us as if we could all read and comprehend Chinese characters fluently, which has been beyond frustrating, and de-motivating.

America's Greenest Executive

I've spent the last couple hours preparing for my mandarin class tomorrow morning by completing the exercises in my workbook - not really because I'm that dilligent a student, because if I was, I wouldn't be doing it the night before class. No. It's because I hate feeling frustrated, lost and clueless.

The exercises are written in Chinese characters, which I can't read particularly well. My instructor gives us at most, all of 10 minutes to decipher the Chinese text and answer the questions before taking it up in class. So I decided after the second time of showing up for class unprepared that it would be the last time if I could help it.

So here I am on a Friday night, doing my Chinese homework. But then I needed a break....so I snacked on some juicy, sweet lichee - yum - and a crisp, seedless persimmon - soo good. And I did this while watching The Hour. The first interview was with Ray Anderson, founder and chairman of Interface, who I had never heard of before. He has been called America's Greenest Executive for being the first CEO to recognize and commit to environmental sustainability as early as 1994. Anyway, I shan't write any more on him...I've procrastinated long enough, but see his interview here if you are so inclined.

Playing hooky

I skipped my mandarin class this morning to sleep in. I figured if there was a class to skip, it would be today's since we were just going to watch a couple of films. I slept in a bit, read the morning paper, and to assuage some of the guilt I felt from playing hooky, I spent some time copying Chinese characters for my assignment.

I still have quite the list of to-dos to get through this weekend, the most important of which is probably applying to a couple jobs. I've been growing increasingly dissatisfied job-wise and though I hadn't planned on it, I ended up having a chat with my manager about it during our regular status meeting earlier this week.

This wouldn't have been the first time we've had this conversation. Right about this time last year, I was job-hunting too, but I wasn't so jaded at the time that I was ready to leave for just any job. So I bided my time for the right role to come along, and since we underwent a couple of organizational changes which came with promises of more interesting work, I stuck around...but after waiting and seeing and waiting and seeing some more, I'm beginning to realize that these were just empty promises.

So before I become any more cynical and jaded about work, it's time to start looking again. The problem though is that I'm not sure what it is I want to be when I grow up. I don't know how to answer that ever-popular question, "So where do you see yourself in 5/10/years?" And I feel like I should have some inkling before going out to interviews.

I have a vague idea of what I'd like to do in my career - I've had a taste of it in my current role - there's just not enough of it to keep me busy on a consistent basis so that I feel like I'm developing and growing. But a role like mine is hard to come by in other companies because not very many have a group focused on strategy like ours does. So what am I looking for? Perhaps it's one of those things that I'll only know when I find it. Which stresses me out because I don't like not knowing. It does not jibe with my ISTJ personality damn it!

Anyway. I'm meeting S tonight for dinner. Perhaps talking out some of my frustration will help bring about some clarity.

Writer's block

I have been sitting here for the last 30 minutes trying to think of something to talk about for my speech assignment in Mandarin class this Saturday. Actually, it's been more like 75 minutes, but I procrastinated by listening to my dialogue CDs and practicing out loud - which I've been neglecting for the last, oh, 6 weeks now.

So here I sit. Staring at my almost blank page.

I have the first sentence down:

Da jia tongxuemen ni hao, which literally means something like, Greetings my fellow students. Stellar, huh?

2007 off to a running start

It's a new year and I'm sitting here half wondering whatever happened to 2006 because it came and went so quickly.

I've been busy the last few days working on my jewelry - I have 5 pieces done and a 6th on the way. The design process is different now that I'm making to sell, because I'm not just making one-off pieces to wear myself. I have to make different pieces that are not only cohesive, but serve different price points - necklaces, bracelets, earrings...I have to go back to Bamiyan to pick up some more findings...and softflex...and more beads, of course.

Needless to say, my new year's eve was a quiet one. My mother cooked up a seafood feast and invited my uncle and his family over. After cleaning up in the kitchen and playing with my baby cousin for a bit, I went back to work, not even noticing that the new year had come and gone until 6 minutes into it. It was a weird new year's too because I'm not accustomed to hearing the pitter-patter of rain against my window pane this time of year.

I finished up around 2:30am, read a bit and then went to bed...only to be awoken this morning when the phone rang around 10:30. I don't know how I'm going to get up for work tomorrow because I've been sleeping late and sleeping in for the last week.

I went to bed last night thinking I'd go for a run today as I'd called ahead to ask and they were open from 10 to 2. I woke up though and my resolve had weakened. I was feeling lazy...but when I heard that it was unseasonably mild - 10C - I knew that I better haul my butt out to the gym because I otherwise wouldn't leave the house. Sad, I know, but I've been working!!

Anyway, I'm glad I went because I had a good run - I didn't quite break 5K, but I was close. I'm not sure whether or not to abandon the program because I average about 4-5K on each run. As the program progresses, the running portion of the sets gets longer...and I've been stuck on Week 4's W1/R6 set for a while now. I haven't gotten so comfortable with this set yet that I can progress to Week 5's W1/R7...cramps are a problem for me...and the thought of Week 7's W1/R10 just about takes my breath away - and not in a good way.

I spent the rest of the afternoon vegging about - I watched a few hours TV and did some laundry and spent some more time with my beads.

Now I must prepare myself for the new year ahead. This first week back at work should be fairly quiet. My performance self-appraisal at work is due on Friday and I DREAD them. So it'll probably take me the rest of the week to muddle through it. My mandarin classes start up again on Saturday so I'll have to start listening to my CDs again - I resolve to listen to them in the car on my way to and from work, like I've been meaning to but haven't. (I'm a lazy student - but I got an A in my last course!) Then of course, there's my business to see to. I've also signed up for a jewelry design course using 3D software that starts the end of the month running twice a week in the evenings.

The job market will likely be more active in the new year so my hunt will be more serious. In the midst of all this, I have to maintain my gym routine...and somehow find time for dating again.

I've always been fairly goal-oriented. I went to a university with a co-op program, so when I was on a study term, I'd focus on school, and only when I was off on work term did I really make the effort to flirt and have fun and date. Same thing happened when I was studying for my CMA - I had no patience or time for dating. Now that I'm mostly over my ex, I've decided it's time to date again...but dating isn't fun for me. I don't have the patience for the get-to-know-you stage. I find it tedious. But it must be done. So I will do it. I have a date Wednesday and on the one hand, I'm looking forward to it, but on the other, I'm dreading the initial awkward conversation. UGH. (I'm terrible. I know.)

Dried honey wafers, etc.

One thing I learned: "Feeling the pain, the anger, the discomfort is already 50% of the healing..." (I already sort of knew this but this serves as a reminder)

One thing I'm grateful for: my cousin A, who sends me love while she sleeps on the other side of the pond

One thing that made me laugh: my brother, who just came home from studying complaining about the 2 guys going on about one's girl issues (you had to be here)

I came across this exercise in daily reflection on a discussion forum awhile back. I thought at the time that it was a good idea because so often we go through the motions of daily living without really living. I had to think hard about the first one though...I didn't want it to be trivial, like, for example, I learned that the National Honey Board launched dried honey wafers this past summer at several trade shows, and I thought to myself, cool, maybe I'll drink more chamomile tea since I don't have to deal with messy honey. But that's dumb because it can't be profound everyday - more often than not, it'll probably be something silly...and that's OK.

I was on MSN this afternoon chatting with a friend from mandarin class about our final. While I was among the first to leave, he had stayed with some others to talk to our professor, who was impressed with our overall progress. He said that some students were advanced enough to skip Level 2 and proceed to Level 3 since the former is largely review of Level 1 (we'd use the same textbook but go at a much faster pace). He convinced a few students to take Level 3 and mentioned names of other students who should also skip ahead. Apparently I am among this group. Funny thing too, because I only just registered for Level 2 this morning after procrastinating for the last week. I'm not sure how I feel about skipping ahead...if we use the same textbook in Level 3 as in Level 1 & 2, then ya, I will probably consider it....perhaps I will email my professor to ask.

I went for another run tonight to work off some lingering anger. I replied back to the ex late last night, very easy and breezy, but there has been no reply. What is UP with the passive-aggressive manipulation!?

Anyway, I realized my mistake a minute too late because I was already committed to my set: the guy next to me running away had some serious BO. I tried to take shallow breaths but it's kinda hard when you're running so was I ever glad when he finished his run 12 minutes into mine. Although I only ran 4 sets, the average pace I set today was an improvement over yesterday's. Yay for me, again!

I'll take a break from the gym tomorrow - our first proper snowfall is forecasted to begin after midnight tonight...about 3-5 cm. 680 News advised that we all get up an extra 30 minutes earlier tomorrow so as to account for the longer expected commute into work. Ha. As if.

Maybe I'll start my holiday baking tomorrow night...

A taste of the many weekends to come

It was very busy Saturday. I had my mandarin written and oral final in the morning and they went well: we had 1.5 hours for the written exam and were scheduled for 10 minute intervals afterwards for our oral exam. I was the 3rd to submit my written exam about 30 minutes in, and followed my professor outside to translate about 10 sentences from English into Mandarin. I was chastised for thinking in Cantonese (my not-so-secret weapon) so had to correct myself a few times.

I was out of there by 11am and had about an hour to kill before I had to head downtown so I went to Ikea to check out their Xmas decorations. We had donated all of our Xmas decorations to the Salvation Army before the renovations started - I figured since we were all grown up anyway there was no point in keeping the tree, etc. - so we're starting from scratch. I thought I'd just buy some green, blue and gold Xmas balls, arrange them in a bowl on the coffee table and call it a day. I didn't buy anything at Ikea though because the shades of blue, green and gold available weren't quite right. So the search continues...

I met SA&WC for lunch at Jules on Spadina and then headed to the One-of-a-Kind Craft Show with SA. I was there to check out the jewelry competition - and there were over 90 vendors there! I knew prior to going that selling at a craft show wasn't my thing, and I'm even more sure of it now. I'm in the market research phase of my jewelry business venture and the more I look into it, the more I think perhaps it's best to keep it a hobby.

It was my first time at the show and I had been warned prior by colleagues that things there were expensive. I'll admit that some things were, but I do believe that hand-crafted, unique items warrant a premium in price. There was certainly stuff there I wouldn't classify as "one-of-a-kind" but whatever.

Debra Jackson

I saw works by a few artists that I really liked, but because I don't yet know how I'm going to decorate my condo, it's premature to buy anything. Some of the paintings by Debra Jackson had a Georgia O'Keefe vibe. She had some fantastic flower paintings that I thought would look great if hung in a series of 3. (I really like the assorted white flowers on the dark brown backgrounds done in acrylic she had on display at the show, similar to the image above) There was another painter that had these bold paintings of fields of flowers but I didn't pick up his card and now I'm kicking myself because I don't know his name. There was also an artist represented by an agent in Montreal (Christopher Fenn) who featured various instruments done in watercolour and embossment that would be perfect, I think for a music room or study - neither of which I have in my condo. Maybe one day when I have a house...I thought Jan Phelan's clay pieces were lovely too.

And Liscious Inc. was there. I've seen their products in a few home furnishing stores in Toronto - I even bought the frosted Bamboo motif panels for my best friend as a housewarming gift. I really like these panels (maybe the cherry blossom motif?) and will probably include them somewhere in my decor...I like the floral black motif wall tiles too...

Anyway...so what did I buy? Dvorak from BC was present and accounted for so I bought their Better Than Sex(!) Chocolate, which I'd discovered last year at the Granville Market. It's dark chocolate that's 72% cocoa - but it's brilliant marketing because who can forget a name like that?! And it IS really, really good. As for whether or not it's better than sex...well, as with everything I suppose it "depends" doesn't it? ;)

I bought some moisturizers too: humble'bubble's organic antioxidant body butter that smells good enough to eat, sort of like - sniff sniff - sweet peanut-chocolate-butterscotch brittle, and Urban Venus' shea butter sticks that I thought would be perfect to take out with me every day - no more having to up-end a travel-size bottle of lotion while I'm waiting at a stoplight!

Oh! And shortbread! The most heavenly, buttery shortbread from Coach House Shortbread Co. (featured this month in Toronto Life) Among their sweets, I tried their original, lemon and orange cardamon (which I ended up buying - YUM!) and of their savoury, the stilton-rosemary and cheddar-chipotle.

It took us about 3 hours to get through the show and then we headed back to SA&WC's place to wait for our friend WL to go out for dinner at Sushi Time on Queen. This is the 2nd weekend I've spent hanging out downtown in what will be my 'hood next year. My best friends live within 5 minutes of each other now and about 10 minutes from where I will be moving to next September. WL predicted that I'd be spending every weekend downtown from now until then...which probably isn't too far off considering I've already got plans down there for the next 2 weekends.

SA and I spent the rest of the night at WL's watching movies...the original plan was to watch Mean Girls, but he couldn't find it, so we ended up watching Imagine Me and You, a movie in which the actors all eerily look like someone else:

Matthew Good = Rupert Everett
Piper Perabo = Jennifer Garner
Lena Headey = Keira Knightley
Darren Boyd = Jay Mohr

The movie starts with a wedding - and this is how I sort of envision my own wedding. I love Rachel's hair (so elegant!) and her dress (the style and shape is lovely but I'm not crazy about the length of the gown) and the purple flowers everywhere!! :)

We followed it up with Disney's Sleeping Beauty, which neither of us girls had seen before. W said it was really gay - high school gay, that is - and it was. But it was also gay-gay because W knew all the lyrics to the songs, hehe! Anyway, S and I were a little exasperated by how dumb Flora, Fauna and Meriweather were but I suppose it's just the jaded skepticism of our old age(!) Perhaps if we'd seen it first with the wonder and innocence of childhood, we'd feel differently.

Today was far more low-key. I slept in til about 11am, puttered about before going out for a 1pm massage, came home for a late lunch with my mother before heading out again to buy a new mattress. That was pretty much it.

Wo shi zhongwen xuesheng

I'm taking a Mandarin class and just spent the last hour doing my Chinese homework translating English sentences into Chinese characters.

I used to dread going to Chinese school on Saturday mornings. When other kids were home watching their Saturday morning cartoons, I was sitting behind a desk in a classroom learning to read and write Chinese. This lasted until the 8th grade, which was just about the time of the arrival of the first wave of immigrants from Hong Kong who were escaping the big hand-over to China. For some stupid reason, their parents enrolled them in Heritage Language classes, meanwhile, they already knew how to read and write quite fluently.

The irony of giving up my Saturday mornings at this late date to go back to Chinese school of my own volition has not escaped me. The difference this time around is that I’m listening to CDs and learning Hanyu Pinyin—at least until I recognize all the radicals and am able to read Chinese.

I decided to learn Mandarin, partly because I was bored and wanted to learn something new, and also because I figure it’s a good skill considering the growing importance of China on the world stage. I have no desire to move to China to work or anything…I’ve visited a couple times and it’s so not where I see myself living…but again, who knows?

I’m happy to discover that I’ve retained quite a bit from all those awful Saturday mornings. I didn’t have to cheat and refer to my text too often in translating:

A: Is he your older brother?
B: No, he’s my father.

A: How many older sisters do you have?
B: I have two older sisters.

Of course, translating from English into Hanyu Pinyin is another story since I haven’t been diligent about studying the text and as a result, get the tone marks wrong half the time.